


Sleeping Alone

by yourrhinestoneeyes



Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Anal Sex, Drinking, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-15
Updated: 2014-08-15
Packaged: 2018-02-13 08:16:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2143590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrhinestoneeyes/pseuds/yourrhinestoneeyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some nights it's hard to not think about the events of the funeral, but it's made easier to forget when you have somebody to help distract your mind for awhile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleeping Alone

This forgetting shit wasn't easy, it wasn't hard either; it more so bordered on nearly impossible. He didn't really feel all that comfortable with this; he had known Toki too damned long to just pretend that the rhythm guitarist had never been in their band. He understood Nathan's reasoning; the vocalist didn't handle bad situations well, he got scared and when he got scared he either got violently mad or he hid away from everything. Pickles couldn't stop thinking about it, it seemed like only yesterday even though it had been over two months ago now. Even after a whole day of drinking and smoking every pipe, joint, cigarette, and bong he could get his hands on he couldn't stop playing the scene over and over in his mind. He still couldn't believe it, he didn't like knowing a guy he'd known for over five years and basically watched grow up could be dead right now. Nobody was handling it all that well. When he had passed by Skwisgaar's room he had stopped long enough to check on him without being caught. The guitarist had been lying on his bed, crack pipe in hand, and loud sobs coming from him. It hadn't been a very pretty sight; Pickles was waiting for Skwisgaar to take it too far with the crack and the meth, he hadn't seen his friend this out of control for years now and it bothered him. He knew just how close Skwisgaar had been with Toki, he couldn't imagine how much this shit and how distant the two of them had been in the past few months was killing him. 

Pickles lit another cigarette, with his first exhale came yet another coughing fit. If immortality meant a fucking thing and from the looks of it he doubted it, then lung cancer shouldn't be a concern for him. The nicotine fix calmed his nerves and made it easier for him to sit still, but his mind was still racing as he sobered up from the past twenty-four hours. He didn't like thinking about this; he just wanted to smoke his cigarette then pass out, he felt eternally exhausted.

Nathan stumbled into his room disrupting all thoughts and plans of sleeping. The singer held onto the door frame for support, in his other hand he held a nearly empty bottle of whiskey. His tired blood shot eyes tried to focus on the red head, but he seemed to fail at only seeing one of him. After a moment of gathering himself he let go of the door frame and stumbled towards the bed; he collapsed face first onto the mattress thankfully managing to not spill any alcohol onto the sheets. He groaned as another wave of sickness hit him, but he was pretty sure he didn't have to vomit this time around. Nathan lifted his head to look up at Pickles, he grinned up at the drummer.

“You still drinking?”

“Yeah, why the fuck not?” 

The large front man managed to pull himself into a sitting position so he could better look at the older man. 

“I dunno probably cause it's three in the morning.”

Nathan shrugged then took another long drink finishing off the bottle. He tossed it towards the head of the bed.

“So, we don't fucking stop. You never stop drinking.”

“Just not really feeling it right now, rather smoke.”

He knew better than to say he was tired of guilt drinking, but he was too scared to face reality. If sober Nathan didn't want to deal with this then he knew that shit faced drunk Nathan sure as hell was not going to deal with this.

“You still mad at me?”

“No, we're cool I told you that after....Y'know after what happened.” Pickles said not wanting to mention the funeral.

Nathan nodded, he glanced away from the red head looking towards the door like he expected somebody to walk in on them talking.

“Do you think uh...Like what happened maybe I don't know....I know we aren't supposed to talk about this shit, but I keep thinking maybe we could have done something to stop it.” 

Pickles kept quiet, he was happy that Nathan was talking about it even if it was only because of his level of inebriation, but he also didn't know how to answer him. He had thought over and over how they should have done something, they knew what Magnus was like, but they also hoped maybe he had grown the hell up after so many years. They didn't know he would still hold a grudge against them especially one that could end in homicide. Pickles also knew that telling Toki to not go around somebody was just something you didn't do, the kid did whatever he wanted and the more you told him no the more he was prone to go and do it. A frustrating habit he had since he was sixteen and one that they had possibly not helped much with.

“Come on man it's....We didn't know and we had other stuff going on.”

Fighting over a woman with little real interest in either of them, fighting over a destroyed album. In hindsight they could have done more, done something instead of nothing, but seeing Nathan beating himself over this made him feel bad. The sad conflicted look in his green eyes made Pickles feel bad. He placed a hand on his friend's shoulder giving it a squeeze. Nathan looked up meeting his eyes and he could see just how much this was tearing him up inside even if he would go right back to ignoring it in an hour or two.

“It's my fault, all of it.”

“Dude don't, don't do this to yourself. We didn't know, you didn't know.”

“Yeah, but he was like a kid brother or some shit, I fucking should have looked after him more. I always fuck up, I'm an idiot. Why am I such a fucking idiot?”

 

“You aren't an idiot, God come here.”

Pickles wrapped his arms around the younger man hugging him. Nathan returned the embrace crushing the smaller man against himself, he buried his face against the crook of his neck. Familiar in a really bitter sweet way. When Nathan pulled back he stared down into the older man's eyes considering something for a second or two, Pickles placed a hand on the back of his head pulling him down until their lips were only an inch apart. Nathan closed the gap kissing him; nothing exactly sweet or romantic, just sloppy and needy, but it's what he felt like they needed. He felt just as lonely and messed up as the singer did, distraction by strangers wasn't doing it for him lately.

Nathan pushed him back onto the bed climbing on top of the smaller man, Pickles bit and tugged at his lower lip earning a groan from the younger musician. He tangled his fingers in thick black hair with one hand while the other pulled at the front of his shirt trying to get him to get closer to him. Nathan slipped a hand up under his shirt grabbing hold of his hip and pulling him up against him; he could feel the beginning of the larger man's erection through his jeans rubbing against him. He ground against him, Nathan moaned again at the friction between the two of them. Both men continued kissing from from needy to rough and hungry, only breaking apart to gasp for air then return to their manic pattern. 

The sound of a belt being unbuckled followed by a zipper then a hand down the front of his pants and a large hand wrapped firmly around his cock started the drummer on a slew of moans and curses. He thrust up into the younger man's fist, fingers digging into his back to give himself leverage. Nathan kissed along the side of his neck biting down. The singer pulled away releasing his grip on Pickles cock leaving the drummer frustrated. 

“Take your clothes off” Nathan ordered his voice muffled as he tried to remove his own shirt.

Pickles smirked entertained by watching the larger man struggle to get out of his clothes, by the time Nathan was fumbling with his pants and had tripped and nearly fell getting out of them Pickles was laughing. The singer glared at him.

“What's funny?”

“Nothing dude, just fucking eager much?” He asked raising a pierced eyebrow.

“Just take your clothes off asshole.” Nathan grumbled as he got back onto the bed.

The drummer had less trouble getting undressed, Nathan watched him seeming fascinated by him that was until Pickles climbed back onto the bed kneeling before him, he took the younger man's chin in his hand tilting his head back so he could look him in the eye. 

“See it's not hard taking your clothes off dude”

“Shut up” 

Nathan pushed the older man back onto the bed resuming his position on top of him. He picked up the discarded bottle of lube laying on the bed, only some of it had spilled out onto the bed during the last time the drummer had sex. Nathan poured some of the liquid onto the palm of his hand rubbing it over his fingers. He pushed the red haired man's legs apart settling between them, Pickles wrapped his legs around the younger man's back lifting his hips up off of the bed giving him better access. He watched the younger man concentrate the best he could on what he was doing as he slowly pushed two fingers inside of his friend's hole. Pickles bit his lower lip repressing a groan at the intrusion; Nathan pulled his fingers half way out then pushed them back in carefully stretching him open. Pickles pushed down against his fingers.

“C'mon Nathan” 

The younger man pushed a third finger inside, Pickles moaned thrusting his hips against Nathan's hand. 

“You can fuck me now, I swear I won't fucking break.”

Over the years that they had done this he noticed Nathan had a fear of hurting his sexual partners, when said partner was his best friend for about eight years he was twice as cautious.

Nathan pulled his fingers out, he emptied the rest of the lube out onto his hand coating his cock with it as thoroughly as he could get it. He lined himself up with the older man's entrance and slowly pushed inside stopping half way. Pickles body tensed, he closed his eyes trying to think past it; yeah he forgot how hung Nathan was. The black haired man rubbed a hand along his inner thigh in an attempt to comfort him.

“You alright?”

“Fuck, yeah fine.”

Pickles opened his eyes looking up at the younger man, the look of concern and worry on his face made him feel bad for him. He always had the dumb sad dog look. The drummer leaned up kissing him.

“You can keep moving”

“If it hurts tell me to stop, alright?”

“Yeah, yeah I will.” 

Nathan pushed further inside, it didn't feel as uncomfortable this time around. When he began pulling out again there was a sense of discomfort, but with each slow careful thrust of his hips the discomfort came somewhere closer to feeling pleasurable. When the head of his cock rubbed against his prostate Pickles bucked his hips, he threw his head back moaning out the singer's name. Nathan's mouth was on his neck the second his head hit the pillow and he began moving his hips at a more moderate pace each thrust making him hit against that same spot pressing and rubbing. Pickles nails dug into his shoulder blades, legs tightening around his back as he drew the singer closer to him. He wanted to feel every single inch of him. Nathan's heavy breathing and growling moans were the only thing he could hear outside of the sound of skin hitting skin. One hand gripped tightly onto his hip, Nathan placed his other hand against the bed holding himself up as he continued to thrust into the older man. Pickles kissed him hard, his tongue finding its way inside of his mouth; he groaned when Nathan flicked the piercing in with his own tongue. He made a note for himself that later he would need to blow the younger man, he just enjoyed the way he moaned and cursed when he had his tongue piercing in. 

“Fuck, you feel really fucking good” 

“I'm really close dude, fuck go harder”

Nathan moved his hand from the bed to the back of the older man's neck, he kissed him hard. He wrapped his other hand around his cock stroking him, he gave his cock a squeeze with every down stroke. His thumb rubbed circles over the tip of his cock making him wish it was Nathan's tongue instead. Another hit to his prostate and the thought of Nathan's mouth on his cock sent him over the edge; he came into the younger man's hand and onto his own stomach. His body tensing, thighs shaking, nails digging harder into flesh, and more unintelligible moans as he rode out his release. His body relaxed against the bed, he closed his eyes and did his best to catch his breath. He smirked when Nathan came inside of him, his head bowed long hair tickling along his chest; he listened to the mutters of 'fuck' being repeated as the younger man finished. Lips pressed against his chest then against his own. The singer was careful as he pulled out then flopped down next to him on the bed. Pickles took a cigarette from his pack then passed the container over to his friend along with the lighter.

“Seriously why did we stop doing that?” Nathan asked after a couple of minutes had passed.

“Stupid shit, I don't know.” Pickles responded shrugging.

Mostly tension; he had thought that after the funeral if things had gone differently that they would have had a make up sex session in the nearest restroom or the second they got through the front door. 

“Do you think I could sleep in here?”

“Sure dude”

They remained in silence smoking, avoiding delving back into what they had been talking about before. Pickles knew the subject was dropped all over again, he wasn't sure when or if it would ever be brought up again. Once their cigarettes were gone and Pickles found himself laying sprawled out on top of the larger man with his head resting on his chest and Nathan's hand on his back he realized for now he could be okay with not thinking about it.


End file.
